written by Luke and Pastor Nancy, performed at Trinity Reformed UCC in Mountville PA.
Luke: Today we're going to hear about the Annunciation. That's when the Angel Gabriel came to Mary and told her "hey, you're gonna have a child and name him Jesus." Man, what a story! but image what that would be like if that were you! I know if a few months ago, someone came up to Kate and announced not only her pregnancy but also the name of our child, why i'd hit that guy so hard.... (notices Nancy).... uhh.... Pastor Nancy?
Nancy: (still going through the newspaper) Yeah?
Luke: I was talking about Gabriel...
Nancy: uh huh... (distracted voice)
L: And how Gabriel visited Dean Thomas and said he was pregnant.
N: That's nice.... i heard that... keep doing what you're doing – I’ll be with you in a minute.
L: YOU'RE NOT PAYING ATTENTION!
N: What?? Yes I am – or I mean to! I'm just a little distracted today. I found out my grandkids want a battery operated, miniature replica of Hummer – red – with doors that open and shut, a real horn, back up lights and fake ignition keys!! And let me tell you – these things do NOT come cheap and I’m trying to find the best deal!
L: Well can't that wait? We're getting ready for worship and...
L: umm... You’ve GOT to be kidding!
N: oh yes, is this Ebay? I had a question about that item #4567. (keeps talking....)
L: seriously?! She’s taking the call...(to the audience) this is... uhh.. unbelievable... what should i do....
N: (As if she doesn’t know what’s going on) “Now what exactly does “gently used” mean?
*Luke gets cell phone out of pocket and dials*
N:– uh huh – and you can have delivery to St. Louis by when?? Oh! Can you hold? This call might be from the manufacturer – “Hello – is this General Motors?”
L: PASTOR NANCY! (*shocked look, looks at Luke and gives a shy smile... Luke continues:
“What's the deal, i just talked last week about centering the season on Christ and you're acting like a nutcase today!”
N: That’s PASTOR NUTCASE to you, my boy!! But hey, you're right. There's just so much to do and I just feel so pressured. I really feel guilty not living near my grandchildren so naturally I want to give them everything they want!! But, ok -- maybe i shouldn't have used this time to think about all the stuff I have to do.
L: Listen – far be it from me to tell you how to celebrate Advent – but didn’t MY sermon last week mention something about “guilt giving”??? Is that Hummer really what you want to give your grandchildren that will leave a lasting impression?? Maybe you need to focus a little bit more on what’s going on here rather than making lists and taking phone calls during the call to worship!!
N: OK – You’ve made your point! I’ll worry about the Hummer later!
L: (Looks totally exasperated – he hasn’t gotten through at all!)
L: To the congregation: “Won’t you join me in the call to worship printed in your bulletin – and PAY ATTENTION!