Layers

just finished watching an episode of Joan of Arcadia...and this particular episode stood out. the episode was in season one called Death Be Not Whatever (2003) i was really struck by the last conversation between God and Joan on the bus.

SET UP: Joan talks to God, Joan learns a boy she's babysitting is dying of Cystic Fibrosis and one of her best friend's mom died, Joan is really angry:

Joan Girardi: A lot of what happens here really sucks, so much for your...perfect system.
[pause]
Joan Girardi: Can you see me being really mad at you right now?
Cute Boy God: Yes.
Joan Girardi: Why does it have to be so hard?
Cute Boy God: What specifically?
Joan Girardi: Being alive, let's start there.
Cute Boy God: You wish you weren't alive?
Joan Girardi: No! I...I don't know. I wish...it didn't...hurt so much.
Cute Boy God: It hurts because you feel it, Joan...because you're alive. You love people, that generates a lot of power, a lot of energy. The same kind of energy that binds atoms together, we've all seen what happens when you try to pry them apart.
Joan Girardi: So, if I don't get attached to people then...it won't hurt so much?
Cute Boy God: No, it's in your nature to get attached to people, I put that in the recipe. It's when you guys try to ignore that...when you try to go it alone, that's when it gets ugly. It's hell.
Joan Girardi: It's Hell? Like the Hell?
Cute Boy God: Oh look, your house. Go on, Joan, people are waiting for you...
(Joan exits the bus with no clear answer and looks puzzled)

humans are funny.

maybe for us the pain of separation is easier to bear than the pain of attachment. we get so wrapped up in our identities, those layers at play who we THINK make up who we are... but that's not the full story. like the song says "your caste, your class, your country, sect, name or your tribe, there's people always dying trying to keep them alive".



these things are a part of our identity, but we must go beyond that. we must help each other regardless of these identities... and help is fluid, it moves around like light. and a little bit is a good thing, and it doesn't stop.

thank you, dear readers, for providing light to me on who i am and who i am perceived to be and i hope i'm providing help to you in the articulation of who you are. dialogue is key to realizing our interconnectedness, it is key to our humanization and prevents systematic DEhumanization.

but these are just my rantings and babblings and i recognize i'm "privileged" with an optimistic and idealistic worldview ;-) i could be WAY off.

what are your thoughts?

Victims Part II

A quote from Charles Swindoll

The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say I do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill.

It will make or break a company... a church... a home. The remarkable thing is that we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for the day. We cannot change our past. We cannot change the fact people will act in a certain way. We cannont change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude.

I'm convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it.

As my wife always says, "you can't change people, only how you react to them." Jesus had one heck of an attitude. To be able to sit with people he prolly wanted to shake and yell "SNAP OUT OF IT!" but he didn't. He met them where they were and changed their lives, our lives, and the course of human history.

may we see to be such beacons of positive attitude and loving empathy.

There's One Thing I Wanna Know...

This weekend we visited the DC area! I gave a prayer at Little River UCC and thanked them for my scholarship... the Hubert S. Beckwith Scholarship. Great congregation. Also hung out with Kate's sister and her family. Great to see how my neices and nephew look at the world and how they've developed into the fine people they have become.

Andrew, my bro-in-law, is the son and step-son of two methodist pastors. He stated something like "when my dads went to seminary they commented on how some of their classmates use seminary as a form of free therapy, is that the case for you?" That comment made me step back and think... i think some people are using it that way and that goes along with what i'm talking about victims... my buddy Jason also brought up the topic of victims and how it's even in the business world... "I couldn't make my sales this week cause no one would pick up the phone, it's not my fault!" and other comments to that affect.

so now i have some new things to ponder and chew on.. great trip! this week is my worship week as well! we've been planing two worship services to go on in the chapel and this is the culmination of all of the groups hardwork. looking forward to see how these services are received. update cha on friday.. but until then!

Go see this movie:



And ask yourself this question... found in the chorus of this song:


oh.. and this question: where are the strong and who are the trusted?

Victims

Interesting phenom with people finding and owning their own victimhood this year in seminary.

I think it's healthy to find and recognize how a system excludes and oppresses people, no matter what! Issues of race, gender, sexual orientation, ability, etc should be examined to the Nth degree. What I weary of is the Stockholm Syndrome.

The Stockholm Syndrome is a psychological response sometimes seen in an abducted hostage, in which the hostage shows signs of loyalty to the hostage-taker, regardless of the danger (or at least risk) in which they have been placed. What I mean in this context here at seminary is when people fall in love with their victimhood and wield their victimhood like a club.

as the saying goes, hurt people hurt people.

It's ironic that these people are now victimizing others with their victimization! they have become what they hate.



Bryce, my seminary library buddy, wrote in his review of James Alison's book Faith Beyond Resentment, "When we self-righteously occupy the position of the victim, demanding retribution and recompense for the abuses we have suffered at the hands of human authorities with their violent enforcement mechanisms, we are not able to move into the area of identifying with the oppressors as our brothers and sisters who are also trapped in the same systems that we occupy."

in other words, for full reconciliation to happen we must give up our victimhood. now this might look like a white male trying to keep his priviledge by dismissing people's experience due to racial, gender, or other issues... i assure you i am not. what I am saying is that if i'm to meet you where you are, i'd hope you'd respect me enough to do the same. no boxes or stereotypes... just two people with their experience looking for common ground.

using a personal example: i have been victimized and you didn't do it! the fact someone is Catholic will not color my opinion of them but i sure do have a slant on the Catholic church! i will share that experience and see if it matches/clashes with theirs. i've met some kindred spirits and i've met people who absolutely LOVE the Catholic church and i'm friends with both and we understand each other. shouldn't this understanding be what we're after in terms of race/gender/LGBT issues/cultural/geo-political/religious/etc. issues in general?!

how far off am i?

Thanks to Bryce for the link and being a sounding board... for a fuller, more thoughtful discussion, check out Bryce's post on Alison's book.